


Winds of Change

by Raining_Sky_Guy



Category: Bleach
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, BAMF Kurosaki Ichigo, Budding Love, Forgiveness, Grief, Ichigo vs Gotei 13, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Leader of a rebellion Ichigo, M/M, Minor Character Death, Onmitsukidou Urahara Kisuke, Redemption, Sacrifice, UraIchi Week 2018, War
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-02
Updated: 2018-07-08
Packaged: 2019-05-17 08:50:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 17,907
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14829153
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Raining_Sky_Guy/pseuds/Raining_Sky_Guy
Summary: A story in which Kisuke and Ichigo meet on opposing sides of the battlefield. They’re not enemies, not really. Kisuke doesn’t align with the war’s ideals, but he does want to keep his job.A story in which, Kisuke looks at the young man risking his life for an ideal and makes him wonder. What is worth so much to risk one’s life?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is the story I've been most excited to post. This was originally going to be my only contribution for this event...  
> All I have to say is that I have no self control.  
> Beta'ed by [CrazyRubsOff](https://archiveofourown.org/users/CrazyRubsOff/pseuds/CrazyRubsOff)

The smell of blood still permeates the air, as the carrion birds gorge themselves on the death feast at their feet and an even worse type of scavenger robs the death of their last dignity.

People had stopped attempting to retrieve the dead when they became too many. It wasn’t unexpected, yet it still made everything several times worse.

The blond man witnessing the carnage was dressed in black Onmitsukidou clothing that covered him from head to toe (the uniform of a murderer). He too looks like a corpse like those on the abandoned battlefield, pale as death and covered in dirt, soot and blood. The big difference is that that's not his blood. His eyes skim over the corpses, laconic. Distant.

What was this war for, anyway?

Urahara Kisuke keeps thinking that this was all a very stupid idea. Why was it so hard for people to just force a smile and reach a compromise?

If they had done that, _then_ Kisuke could still be back at home, tinkering with his latest experiments and pets. Instead of being in a uniform he seldom used now, poisoning water sources and killing rebels while the captains kept him on a leash.

It’s not like it wasn’t in his job description. He had been trained as Onmitsukidou and he held no ill will against the Gotei 13 but…

This war was so pointless _._

It wasn’t a war over territory, over a dispute, not even over honor.

It was that an upstart brat had gotten (unfairly, maybe) convicted and sentenced to death, and his even more hot-blooded friend hadn’t been properly dealt with, had scurried away and later decided to wage a war against the Gotei 13 _ideals._

This man wanted to change the whole society? Whatever for?

True, they got a lot of hate for being so ruthless. And sure, some captains ended up starting fires by punishing or executing people that were a bother to them but… it had been such a long running thing. Why change it now?

And also,

The Gotei fought to protect their privileges, to protect themselves and the life they had been living in so far. But why did the rebels fight?

Fighting and dying and suffering just for the ideal of … what? Justice? Honor?

It had been several centuries since Kisuke had had to toss those things away to become Onmitsukidou and gain access to both power and connections.

It’s not like he had a good grasp on either since the start though so he’s probably not the best example.

The man worms a finger under the cloth wrapped around his mouth to scratch an itch as he finally shifted to turn to his current predicament.

Sleeping fitfully, no less than twenty meters away from him, was the icon of the rebel’s side.

Kurosaki Ichigo.

He still wasn’t sure how this had all happened. One moment Kisuke is murdering people left and right, letting Benihime sing in joy– and next thing he knows, The Rebel (with capital letters) does something as dumb as stop a comrade of his from dying by standing on the way of the killing blow.

But the young man doesn’t die. No, he pulls  a trump card _out of his ass._ Kisuke lost his focus as he couldn’t help but grow irritated at the unfairness of how _magically,_ the man had awakened his Hollow Powers and avoided dying.

Then, something happened, and Kisuke barely had seconds to shunpo away before a detonation occurred. He barely escaped the effects of the explosion but Kisuke would say that the devastation was close to a kilometer in radius. And right in the epicenter of it, The Rebel laid, collapsed and vulnerable and up for takes.

Kisuke’s mind immediately supplied him with a list.

One, he was the only one (alive) who had seen this.

Two, if he took his life, the war would be essentially over. The rebels depended too much on him for morale and strength.

And three, Kisuke’s superiors wouldn’t let him return to his projects until every single rebel was dead.

 

He wasn’t on this war out of personal choice. But the young man collapsed on the battlefield was.

A burning curiosity had sprouted in his chest.

He wanted to know, why did he do it? What drove him to lead the rebellion?

Which returned Kisuke to the present, as the essentially kidnapped man began rousing from his sleep.

“What-? What-?” The orange-haired individual was saying, drowsily easing himself up, and trying to understand his surroundings and-

Their eyes met.

In an instant, the drowsy soul springs to his feet, grabs his sword and drops into a stance as quick as lightning. In the same moment, Kisuke could only blink as he tried not reacting outwardly. He had gambled that The Rebel would not slay him without motive, and Kisuke knew he’d be more willing to answer if he was not bound in chains.

When Kisuke did nothing more than sigh into his propped hand, Ichigo’s blade actually dips. Kisuke doesn’t know if he’s more surprised at still having a head or at his enemy’s reaction of basically relaxing his guard.

“Where am I?” He demands, choosing to talk over trying to eviscerate Kisuke. See, this kid was really odd.

“In a cave near the area you completely obliterated. North Rukongai.” Kisuke replies mildly, voice muffled over the black mask that hid the lower half of his face. Ichigo blinked, and when he noticed that Kisuke really wasn’t trying to fight, he lowered Zangetsu altogether.

Why?

The curiosity roaring inside him still refused to quiet down.

“Did… did you save me?” Ichigo then said, sounding skeptic and confused.

Kisuke thought about it. He had just picked him up and away from the massacre. But there was nobody actively hunting him at the moment. Still, it would put him in his good graces.

“Something like that.” He replies, voice still as mellow and bland as cotton.

The Rebel’s eyes narrow. “Why?”

Kisuke’s mind deems it safe to pull up some dramatic act and he proceeds to see what happens if he does. “Aren’t you even going to thank me first? I am hurt.”

Ichigo scowls harder. Kisuke huffs out in amusement, a little confused (but relieved) to see him still not trying to murder him. The man slowly moves to be completely facing him, posture light and unassuming and ready to disappear at the smallest sight of a threat.

 

When it seems obvious that the other wouldn’t add or say anything until Kisuke answers, the man shrugs. “I may be part of the Gotei 13, but I don’t care for this petty war.”

Much to his amusement, Kurosaki’s eyes lit up with fury. Not surprising, considering that no one liked having their own battles questioned or ridiculed. What was actually surprising was that the young man didn’t attack him on the spot, instead he works his jaw furiously, calming himself before he can coherently return,

“You have a lot of blood on your hands for ‘not caring’.” He accuses, voice dangerous and so much like Kyouraku that it made a shiver want to crawl up his spine. And still, he wasn’t trying to impale him–yet.

The Onmitsukidou soldier and vice-commander shrugs. “It’s my job. I’m an attack hound. They point and I bite.” He smiled under his mask.

“So basically you’re a coward.” Ichigo says, dry and with a sneer of disgust.

“My, aren’t you a mouthy little brat.” Kisuke hears himself reply, voice dropping an octave and pinning him with a glare which was returned equally.

“Did I perhaps hit a nerve?” Ichigo’s sneer widens.

“I think you are far too conceited. Certainly, having never had someone to answer to, you think you have the right to pass judgement on those who do.” Kisuke isn’t normally one to resort to petty arguments, but he does know how to reply in kind. “You lawless rebels. Thinking yourselves superior. Claiming there is something wrong, yet doing nothing about it.”

Ichigo’s demeanor loses some of its intensity at those words. “We… we are sort of in a war, right now. To, you know, change things. In case you forgot.” He finishes, almost mocking. A distant part of Kisuke wonders if their beloved War Icon isn’t as unhinged as the worst of them.

Kisuke blinks out of his emotions. The inflection in his voice could be mocking, but… the man looked… “Is there something amusing, rebel-san?”

His expression closes off. “Besides your stupid get-up?”

Kisuke has to refrain from doing something as silly as roll his eyes. “I fear this conversation has derailed horribly, I’m afraid.”

“Right. I’m Ichigo.”

Kisuke blinks at him like he was a particularly stupid individual. “I know.” He replies. “I doubt there’s anyone who doesn’t know who you are, rebel-san.”

“Well, since you keep calling me ‘rebel-san’ I had my doubts. I gave you my name so you would stop calling me that. Also, the obvious thing is to reciprocate, but since it’s clear you’re not the sharpest tool in the shed, I’ll help you. What’s your name?” He says, his smile showing too much teeth and there’s a sneer he can’t quite erase.

Kisuke almost decides to try to gut the poor bastard in that moment. Instead, he returns the savage grin with one of his own.

“No, dear Ichigo. I think I’m obliged to clear up some things. I am not the one daft enough to just blurt out sensitive information to my enemy. Or just, entertain this conversation with me instead of returning to your friends.”

And Ichigo…

Ichigo doesn’t get angry.

He just cocks his head, staring at his face as if he were contemplating a particularly fascinating piece of art.

 

Unnerved, Kisuke pulls back together his bland mask, waiting for a reply.

“You didn’t try to kill me though.”

“Pardon?”

“ _And_ you brought me here.” Ichigo continued, not listening to the other. “And you have yet to ask for actual sensitive information. Either you’re a crap spy or… you wanted to talk to me.”

This almost-a-boy was so intuitive it was _creepy._

 

“If the Gotei’s ideals don’t align with yours, why do you stick with them? If you really don’t want to take part in this war why don’t you join us? You don’t even have to be on the frontlines, you could protect the civilians, cure the ill. We will protect you and you won’t have to kill anyone else.”

Kisuke actually stops moving. He stills so suddenly Ichigo tenses up, but his eyebrows rose when Kisuke’s eyes widened comically.

There is a moment of silence before he can form coherent sentences again. “I must say, I’m concerned about you, Ichigo. You _do_ realize we are enemies? Did you hit your head too hard? In that case-“

“You certainly love talking crap.” Ichigo actually rolls his eyes and Kisuke vaguely entertained the thought that if this man wasn’t as powerful, that might have been a good moment to kill him.

“All you have ever known about me is that I’m good at gutting and killing your friends. Yet you offer this- this _proposal_ to join your side with no guarantee that I won’t stab you in the back.” Kisuke feels the need to clarify, because certainly he had forgotten.

Ichigo stares at him. “You yourself stated that you are a dog. I bet you don’t really have a choice, either kill or get killed.” He doesn’t elaborate further. He simply continues. “And it’s not like you’d join us right away.”

The way The Rebel is taking him seriously unnerves him for more than one reason. The Onmitsukidou dog tightens his grasp on Benihime. “This talk certainly is dangerous for me. Don’t make it seem as if I’d defect.”

“You’d be surprised how persuasive I can be.” Ichigo grins, confident and sure of himself.

Kisuke’s eyes go cold as he understands. “Ichimaru Gin was a snake from the beginning. I knew that as long as you held Matsumoto hostage, he would do anything for you. Besides, according to my job requirements, thinking about defecting is punishable by death, and if you attempt to defect, you and your entire clan are wiped out. Not really an enticing idea.”

He fakes a light-hearted tone as a reaction to Ichigo’s triumph over Ichimaru which serves the purpose of getting him off his high horse.

He’s no longer smiling, he actually looks enraged for one frightening moment. “How can you work for such a disgusting place?”

Kisuke arches an eyebrow. “We keep talking in circles, Ichigo.” He waits if the other has anything to add, then decides to push. “Enough about me. Why don’t you tell me a little about yourself? Why do you fight in this war?”

Ichigo straightens to attention. “To protect my friends-“

“What a noble cause.” Kisuke interrupts tonelessly.

“The ways of the Gotei 13 are savage and if they don’t change, sooner or later we will be forced to either work for it, or die by its hand. I already lost a friend. I won’t lose anyone else.”

The words ring inside his mind, certainly it hadn't just been a single death that had detonated this whole nonsense.

“So instead of yours, it’s my friends who have to die.”

Ichigo cringes. “Don’t presume that I enjoy this fight. We could have reached a compromise. We were willing to talk, to negotiate. And the Gotei 13 …”

“Isn’t all-seeing. You could have grabbed your friends and disappeared off the grid.”

“That would just be escaping the problem. And… we would have been forever in fear of being found. No. We need to change things.”

Kisuke briefly recalls. It begins to make sense. “You make yourself sound like such a hero, but isn’t your goal revenge?”

Ichigo frowns. “Why’d you say that?”

“The first time you appeared as the War Hero, the Shiba massacre resurfaced after almost a hundred years. Coincidence? Maybe, but when Kenpachi tried thrashing the old manor, it was you who flew in a fit of rage and murdered the man. Your reaction made it seem as if you were friends with them.”

Ichigo’s face goes through a range of emotions, from surprise to anger to brief pain.“… Does it really matter?”

Kisuke considers this even as he savors and classifies his reactions. “It would make you more real, at least. Revenge I can understand, flimsy ideals I do not.”

“But it’s not entirely revenge.” Ichigo corrects him, voice soft. Kisuke’s expression turns to stone in preparation for whatever the man would say. “I _am_ angry. But what will killing everyone accomplish? Besides making Kaien disappointed in me? He died speaking out against the wrongdoings of society. He died because…” He stops, and looks at him. “I’d continue, but I doubt you actually care.”

Kisuke wants to tell him that no, he _was_ interested in this, but that would be giving away too much so he remains silent.

Ichigo huffs to himself, unsurprised by the reaction but he forges on despite his own words. “If I want to stop another pointless murder, I can’t cower away, and trying to kill everyone who opposes me completely defeats the purpose. Things can change. They have to. Otherwise we’ll all just drown in our own ineptitude.”

“You truly believe this.” Kisuke states more than asks. Ichigo slants him a tired look.

“I go to _war_ because of this, it would be stupid to not believe it.”

“Lawless and idealistic. Aren’t you a scary lot.”

Ichigo scowls as if those words were insulting. “Says the asshole who kills because he is too scared of talking back.”

Kisuke straightens his back, tucking every ounce of emotion back. “I may not align with them. But what they do or not do is of no concern to me. Make no mistake, Ichigo. I am in this with both my eyes open. And you’re not the only one who wants to protect those close to him.”

Ichigo inhales abruptly, animosity all but forgotten. “Are they held hostage?”

“Ugh, there’s that glint of craziness in your eyes. I will not answer that, nor I will accept any sort of suggestion or help from you. These are my problems. Your _enemy’s_ problems.” Kisuke almost moved to show his uneasiness.

Ichigo rolls his eyes again. He either did not consider Kisuke a threat or simply did not think he’d be able to harm him. Both were probably right. “Suit yourself. But, really. I want this war to end. I don’t want more bloodshed. Maybe not join our side, but at least don’t ignore what you see. Talk some sense into your friends. Let’s reach a compromise.”

“I’m not sure whether to  call you naïve or…” Kisuke shook his head. Before Ichigo could input anything else, he stood up, sword light in his grasp. “As interesting as this conversation is, I’m afraid we must part for now, Ichigo.”

He relished in the fact that Ichigo’s face was confused for a long moment before he caught the approaching signals.

Not all-powerful, are we? Kisuke thinks with some relief. He steps up softly, to seem unthreatening and then sighed. “Now, just to make this a little more believable...” His words haven’t finished traveling the distance over to Ichigo when they are already clashing, zanpakuto against zanpakuto. Kisuke is fast, reiatsu and aura unnoticeable until he hits, bloodlust exploding like a volcano only for it to disappear again as Kisuke makes fast work of his shunpo, twirls and tries to behead The Rebel.

As expected, his blade is met and he is pushed away. He persists, getting to his feet and once more appearing by Ichigo’s back. He’s faster this time and Ichigo won’t be able to turn in time to at least avoid getting injured, but then-

A hand shoots out and a _cero_ blasts a hole through Kisuke’s abdomen.

 _Interesting_ , Kisuke thinks while trying to hold his guts in. Ichigo cringes a little at seeing the wound but doesn’t offer help. Almost upon them are Ichigo’s friends.

Kisuke spits out blood, smiles at him mockingly before he darts away to his punishment. At least like this, it was less likely they’d bitch to him about disappearing.

He would still probably be flogged.

 

* * *

 

 

 He doesn't get flogged.

Weirdly enough he gets a sick pass as he is given quick first aid and ordered to return to his lab. Kisuke is confused, but complies and doesn’t say a word about it to Aizen who also looks surprised. The other man simply smiles his soothing fake smile. “Survived for another experiment I see.”

“Let’s get on with it, before they need me back on the field.” Kisuke rolls his eyes as he strolls forward taking up his data sheets from where he had last left them. He stared at them blankly for a long moment. “Say, do we have any documented cases of Hollowified individuals being capable of shooting a cero?”

Aizen seems mildly puzzled. “As far as I know only the self-named Vizards of those rebels. And, of course, my Arrancars.”

Kisuke snaps out of his trance. “How many successful Arrancars do you have now?”

“So far only eight.”

“Sou-chan, I’ve been away a week at most.”

“I know, and please refrain from using such nicknames.” Aizen replies irritably, but his face is almost blank. Kisuke always tried to get a rise out of him for that very same reason. “And actually, the success rate is such that I suggest we drop the Hollowification project altogether, hollows we can spare. Shinigami… it’s harder to hide.”

Kisuke grimaces, remembering the cero and the blast and the hole on his stomach. “There’s so much untapped potential though…” He looks back at his partner. “Besides, eight, we might be able to bullshit our way through. But how are you going to justify the existence of an army consisting of an aberration of a hollow?”

Aizen grins, his face promising blood. “They’ll have no choice.”

Kisuke sure hoped that he meant the war weakening the Gotei and not him personally beating them into submission. Both were still a hassle.

 

The Hollows-turned-shinigami are kept subdued thanks to Aizen’s zanpakuto’s ability so both scientists can observe them at leisure as they finally reach their containment cells.

They’re all staring off into space, jaws slack and Kisuke is amazed at how much they could resemble actual Shinigami. Aizen lets him prod, injure and asses them and answers all of his questions and then asks some of his own.

Kisuke’s mind is a whirlwind and even though he’s disappointed that he might not get to produce his own version of the ‘Vizards’ as they called themselves, he would be able to study this anomaly from the other edge of the spectrum.

What he didn’t know was that as soon as his stomach healed, he would be once again shoved into the battlefield.

 

* * *

 

Next time they meet, they’re on opposing sides of the battlefield. Ichigo is cleaving through his enemies like they were nothing but a nuisance and Kisuke is also at the vanguard –because this was his chosen punishment for daring to protest– and while gutting dozens upon dozens of faceless foes, he subtly tries to move away from the force of nature known as Ichigo.

Still, their eyes meet.

Ichigo grins, savage and enticing and not a hundred percent Shinigami.

Kisuke pretends he doesn’t notice, but instead of a quick stab to the heart, he beheads the next person in his line of sight. Partly as a statement. Partly because he was that irritated.

  

* * *

 

 

Shihoin Yoruichi is a formidable opponent. She’s the fastest and the snarkiest and held so much power she was basically untouchable.

But her dear, hot-headed protégée had made (several) mistakes and had been taken as a hostage by the rebels.

Which resulted in Kisuke being handed a mission to dispose of Soi-Fon to stop Yoruichi from being manipulated as had happened in Ichimaru’s case. He almost refuses. Not only because Yoruichi is the closest thing he’s got to a friend, but because she’s _his_ superior, and Yamamoto has no business interfering with that, but…

He was a dog. He was meant to bite, not ask.

 

He steals into the rebel’s barracks using the cover of the night and quickly finds her. He’s good, but he’s not perfect nor all-powerful, so he has little time before the rebels notice something is wrong and start looking for him.

Soi Fon notices him as he makes his way over to her containment cell and her eyes gain hope. Kisuke doesn’t say anything as he produces the poison pills from his bags and offers them to her.

Her face drops even though she can’t possibly know what those are. Like a kicked puppy, she lets her head hang but still accepts them and downs them with a grimace.

She doesn’t ask to be saved.

She doesn’t beg.

Kisuke doesn’t try.

 

* * *

 

He manages to slip away, undetected until he bumps into none other than Kurosaki Ichigo.

“Well, I thought it smelt rotten ‘round here.” Ichigo said to the air, and Kisuke flinches.

He was pretty sure his stealth cloak was still in place but Ichigo’s golden eyes were staring in his direction, though not exactly meeting his eyes. He wondered if being a shinigami-Hollow hybrid gave them heightened senses.

“Here to rescue someone? Don’t worry, she’s being kept safe. You’ll have her back if you’d only consider-“ Ichigo starts, voice firm but face strangely soft.

“She’s dead.” Kisuke shoots back mildly. This gives the other man pause. His expression immediately soured.

“Why would you-?”

“The Gotei 13 has no need for soldiers too weak to avoid being held hostage.”

Ichigo’s face darkens. His eyes burn like embers. “You little _fucker_. Why do you have to be such a loyal little _bitch_?”

Kisuke smiles wide, even though he can’t be seen. “My, because that’s part of my job description. So, toss her away. Leave her on the battlefield. You have no use for a corpse, and we’d like her to get properly buried.”

Ichigo scowls.

“Just a suggestion,” Kisuke intones, before he is gone.

 

* * *

 

Not even a day later, he goes after Yoruichi, following her as she sprints across No-man’s land to retrieve the precious corpse. She doesn’t cry. But she’s close.

Kisuke doesn’t like that, because if the proud catwoman wouldn’t cry for the object of her affections, then there was no chance she’d cry for him.

He wonders mildly why would he even care.

Instead, he tries to draw her attention, time and time again until the Onmitsukidou  commander finally lets him close to the blue-fingered corpse.

Kisuke slowly checks over her, surreptitiously slipping some more poison down her throat.

 

Slowly, Soi-Fon’s heart begins to beat again.

 

Yoruichi is so surprised she might have let her weakened friend die by accident. Kisuke dutifully  informed her that if she was not dead, she should be hurried to the Fourth.

Yoruichi isn’t stupid. She glances at him, raises a hand to caress his stubbly chin before departing.

They had asked Kisuke to poison Soi Fon. But the dosage was important. And some poisons acted directly against others, nullifying their effects.

It was not likely they’d know.

 

* * *

 

He’s once more punished by being tossed in the vanguard for ‘failing his mission’. He once more sees Ichigo. He miraculously survives the encounter again, probably thanks to Yoruichi having his back for once as Soi-Fon attacked from the distance.

She wasn’t far enough for Ichigo to miss her.

His eyes widen and he slants a surprised expression towards Kisuke. The soldier manages a grimace before he’s knocked unconscious.

 

* * *

 

 “You saved her.”

Kisuke’s eyes shot open. He vaguely recognizes the place to be the (highly guarded) Fourth’s barracks. He breathes in, slowly, calmly. Once he thinks he avoided having a heart-attack he turns to his uninvited visitor. “Are you stalking me?”

“You risked yourself to save her.” The Rebel said, standing eerily by his bedside. If Kisuke wasn’t bound to the bed, he’d have already jumped away. As it is, he can only resign himself to his fate.

“And are you here to exact revenge?” Kisuke shoots back mildly, not even attempting to reach for Benihime. He was way too vulnerable and if Ichigo wanted him dead, there was nothing he could do about it other than resign himself.

“The Gotei wouldn’t have ordered you to save her.” He continues, once more talking to himself and ignoring Kisuke. Kisuke almost wanted to tell him that if he was going to ignore him, he might as well leave him alone. Instead, he finds the balls to say, voice as mild as ever,

“Ah, so this is your plan. You’ll just expose me in my barracks so the Gotei can execute me without you moving a finger.”

Ichigo actually looks chastised. “Sorry.”

Kisuke stops staring at the ceiling to look at him. “Whatever for?”

“I just wanted to thank you.”

“…I beg your pardon?”

“Well, maybe not that exactly. Just… I think there’s more to you than you let show. And having you as a spy would benefit us-“

“Are you out of your _mind_?” Kisuke hisses, his injuries crying in pain as he half-sat up, pulling against the binds on his bed. “Do you seriously want us to get killed? You sneak inside the enemy’s lair just to rave your mouth off and-“

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen you this riled up. Not even on the battlefield.” Ichigo interrupts him, looking more surprised by what he was seeing that the possibility of being found and killed.

Kisuke abruptly realizes he doesn’t have his mask nor his head covered. His face is completely exposed. _He_ feels exposed.

Ichigo just takes everything in stride, still not looking concerned. “Not to worry, a friend of mine cast a barrier ‘round here. Nobody can hear us.”

Kisuke blinked, feeling dread in the pit of the stomach. What had he gotten himself into? “I am starting to regret saving you, Ichigo.”

Ichigo actually grins at that, and he looks several decades younger. “Nah, you’ll thank me someday.”

“Ha, and I guess I’ll buy you a drink as well?” Kisuke laughs bitterly and on edge. There’s a corner of almost anger in his expression that Ichigo decided not to acknowledge.

There’s noise in the corridor. Both men stare at it.

“Well, looks like I got to go. Well let me just tell you that both Soi Fon and Yoruichi have been added to the list of people we’ll try not to kill. So, put in a good word for us, in exchange, alright?”

 

When the nurse arrives to his spot with his painkillers, she is slightly worried to see Kisuke staring with concern at the ceiling, hands over his mouth as if he were praying. He proceeds to overdose on pills and he is out of commission for the following twenty-four hours.

 

* * *

 

 He doesn't ‘put in a good word’ to anyone.

Of course he doesn’t.

Soi Fon might have been a good spy, but she’s no actress. She too believes that her survival was mere chance and that Kisuke had gotten the dosage incorrect. Yoruichi doesn’t try to correct her, but that means she can’t act too thankful without everyone being suspicious.

 

But even if Kisuke’s mouth remains tight, he begins to notice that the War Icon’s name keeps popping up, nothing more than a hushed whisper.

And they weren’t all bad things.

Kisuke had to wonder how this man had managed to crawl under the skin of so many people.

Was this how he wanted to end the war?

Was Kisuke also a part in it?

Curiosity continues to burn in his gut.

Was it possible to end the war in such a way?

If it was that man… maybe it was possible.

 

* * *

 

 “Any progress with the Hollowification?” Kisuke asks his lab partner Aizen as he watched the battles from his favorite spot behind the window. Against his better judgment he had still not terminated that particular project, if the lawless rebels had found a way then certainly Kisuke could as well.

“No. I don’t know what they do to force their souls into the progress and stop before they are completely consumed.” Aizen replies, aggravated, even as he goes over the deceased rates. He flips a page and smiles at his other project. “But, I have made progress on unlocking my Arrancar’s released form.”

“Oh?” Kisuke looks away to arch an eyebrow at him. “I must confess I am intrigued, Sou-chan.”

“I will tell you all about it when you stop with your ridiculous nicknames,” Aizen says, smiling so pleasantly it made Kisuke’s hair stand on end.

As they went over the Arrancar project, Kisuke felt like asking. “Do you suppose they really are Hollow powers? Not just some imitation to throw us off?”

Aizen looks away from the drowsy Ulquiorra while stabbing him. “Do you think they would go through all that trouble?”

“I don’t know. But it looks so… controlled. Not even our Arrancar were stable at the beginning.”

Aizen and Kisuke stare at each other.

“You don’t think they have found…”

“Now Kurosaki Ichigo has Hollow powers too. I mean…”

Aizen hums under his breath, irritated. “Well. Maybe the Soul King is standing on their side.”

“Him too, huh?” Kisuke mumbles to himself, remembering the countless whispers floating around.

 

* * *

 

 People have begun defecting.

 

Non-important people, but people nonetheless.

Kisuke wouldn’t really care except…

Well, it was his job to kill them.

He doesn’t care. He’s not supposed to care, but he begins recognizing the faces.

Kira Izuru. Hisagi Shuuhei. Other people that Kisuke had shared a meal with, or had complained with at the Academy.

He was Onmitsukidou, but not even he could keep his food down some days. At least his commander had taken pity on him and would let him curl up by her side, late at night when the shouting in his ears had become too much.

He had been trained out of his feelings, of his attachments but…

All this killing was so _pointless._

What were they trying to defend if they were killing all those that had stood by their side?

 

On one of his patrols, he stumbled into another runaway.

Abarai Renji.

Kisuke stares at him, frozen in motion, Benihime already in hand because if he’s anything he’s efficient even if he hates himself sometimes. He doesn’t do it though. He just stands there until Abarai notices him. Fear shone in his eyes but the young man doesn’t beg.

He knows he can’t outrun him; he knows he can’t beat him. This was the end and Abarai would see it with as much dignity as possible.

(Is this what they have all been reduced to?)

“I… I haven’t been ordered to kill you.” He finds himself saying, haltingly.

Abarai flinches, before his eyes widen, as the words begin to pass through the thick fear and they are heard. The smallest flame of hope lights up his eyes.

 “Really?” He whispers, looking Kisuke’s way with a wobbly smile, still unsure if the man was telling the truth. The blond executioner notices this, but he’s too numb to do anything. That seems to be alright with Abarai as he sighs in relief. He looks behind him a couple times. “Then? You’ll let me leave?”

Kisuke is annoyed he’s asking so many questions. But he doesn’t react to them, doesn’t answer. For Abarai that was good enough and after one last glance, the man smiles and takes off with his best shunpo.

Kisuke didn’t stop him. Even when he was sent after him, he pretended not to know where he was.

Nobody faulted him.

 

 

* * *

 

Soon enough there was another person shadowing him as he did another stupid perimeter check.

“I can sense you, Ichigo. Leave me alone.” Kisuke bites out, voice muffled by his now-always-present mask. He’s probably not as wary as he’s supposed to be. He blames it on his growing apathy–forced by him to be able to sleep at night.

“Aw, is someone pissy?” Ichigo says, grin mocking. Kisuke looks at him briefly before slanting his eyes away without saying anything, it was the first time he ever looked away from an enemy, but he was growing used to Ichigo not trying to murder him. He actually began to walk away. “Oi, Kisuke-“

There’s a blade pointed to his face. Silent as the grave and as fast as wind, Kisuke is in front of him, sword drawn and bleeding reiatsu. Kisuke doesn’t really have any expression on when he asks, “Who told you?”

Ichigo is wary but not overly worried. His hands are raised half as a sign of peace and half to probably murder Kisuke without a blade. “Your friend Renji mentioned how you helped him get away. I just came by to thank you.”

Kisuke’s hand does not waver. “Did he give away any other information?”

Ichigo actually looks sad now. His voice is quiet when he replies. “No. He asked for shelter. That’s all.”

“Stop trying to convince people to join you.” Kisuke throws at him as if it were an accusation. Ichigo looks hurt for a moment before he sneers.

“Why not? Because you’re forced to kill them?”

“Laugh all you want, but those were my… “ Kisuke falls silent. The silence is thick, piercing, just like Ichigo’s brown eyes.

The Rebel looks down briefly, his face losing its edge. He just looks tired. “Kisuke, you know it isn’t right. Why don’t you fight it?”

“Do not use my name.” Kisuke is saying before Ichigo finishes talking. Benihime is pushed closer to his face but Ichigo just pulls his neck back, still staring at him.

“Sorry, habit. What would you prefer?”

Kisuke bristles, and that’s the only reason Benihime wavers. “Why are you even trying to recruit me?”

“Because I see hope in you. Kisuke…“ He trails off as he sees his steel eyes shimmering with his reiatsu like a storm trapped within a man. He decides he’ll push another day. “Alright I’ll leave you alone. Just. Look for Toushiro.”

Toushiro?

 

* * *

 

“Hitsugaya-taicho.” Kisuke says as all greeting before ducking into the Tenth’s barracks. The young captain jumps in place and almost seems to want to bolt away upon seeing who is there. Kisuke doesn’t blame him. His presence hadn’t been good news for anyone lately. “May I have a word?”

“Are you here on someone’s orders?” The youngest captain asks warily. Kisuke realizes they had never previously exchanged words. Meaning, that this scrawny boy was as pure as they came. Kisuke briefly wondered how he had gotten to be captain; how much raw strength did he wield for him to be able to have a voice in this vicious world? Certainly not enough to avoid the multiple injuries littering his body. Young captain probably wanted to oversee everything in his division before seeking a healer. No wonder he had gotten Ichigo’s attention.

“Would you suppose I would tell you if it were true?” Kisuke says, making the short captain huff, rubbing at his face tiredly. He was very young. Strong, certainly, but very innocent.

(Who did he have to protect?)

“Right. What do you want?”

“I have in good authority that you have made contact with a rebel.”

A muscle jumped in his jaw. Kisuke inhales and can almost taste the fear.

“I have not spoken with Matsumoto or Ichimaru-tai… Ichimaru since they were kidnapped.” Ice eyes look at him square in the eye. “You know that.”

“Yes. Who I’m referring to is Ichigo.”

“What? On what grounds do you accuse me of such?”

“Ichigo himself told me.” The blond man says, voice as mild and posture as uncompromising as ever. The young man’s skin drains of color to turn a paper white.

He smiles feebly, “W-well… I didn’t think I’d be betrayed by-“

“Oh, no, Hitsugaya-kun. I’m here because Ichigo has also made some propositions to me.”

Relief comes crashing down so suddenly Hitsugaya’s legs falter. For a long moment, he just takes in deep breaths. Then,

“You should have started with that!”

 

 

* * *

 

He talks to Yoruichi as well. He finds her to give his daily report and strikes up an actual conversation with her. They’re in her bedchambers, only the two of them and Soi Fon standing guard outside. Yoruichi smiles at him, as if knowing that this conversation was no casual banter and had a purpose.

After a while, Kisuke finally relents.

“Why do you follow the Gotei 13?”

“… What is that supposed to mean?”

“I’m just wondering.”

“That is not how a member of the Onmitsukidou is supposed to act.” The Commander is the one who speaks in behalf of his friend. Kisuke feels a little sick in the stomach because surely even if Yoruichi was sort of his friend, she was the Onmitsukidou commander first and foremost.

“We exist to keep order within our ranks, Yoruichi. The Gotei is meant to protect others. I didn’t really care why this war was caused but… if they ask me to kill my comrades, then I think I have the right to question some things.” Kisuke finally relents the most important part of the truth.

Yoruichi remains silent.

But he sees her doubt. He sees her pain. He misses Soi Fon scurrying away.

 

* * *

 

“…Kisuke.”

“Ah, Ichigo, yes. I sensed you before.”

“What did they do to you?”

“Are you blind too? I was punished.”

“They blinded you.”

“In a nutshell.”

“Why?”

“I did as you asked, I talked to Yoruichi. Soi Fon… eavesdropped and didn’t take as kindly.”

“I’m… I‘m really sorry.”

“Oh, no.” Kisuke says with entirely too much cheer for having just had his eyeballs gouged out. Dry blood still clung to his cheeks. His voice was hoarse. “This has made my decision very clear. I’ll help you. Let’s overthrow these idiots.”

“Heh. Curious how you’re beginning to see now that you don’t have eyes.”

“Very funny.”

“…May I?”

“I feel you’ll do it regardless of my decision, but yeah, go ahead.”

A calloused hand softly cups his face, tilting his head up and then to the sides as Ichigo assessed the damage.

“… I have a friend,” he finally says, letting his face go. “Who might be able to heal you. But…”

“You need me as a spy and it would be suspicious for me to suddenly be healed. Worry not, Ichigo. This is not something I cannot heal by myself.”

“Are you a healer too?”

“I’m nothing of the sort. I’m more of a… builder.”

“Right.”

“By the way, you might want to apologize to Hitsugaya-taicho.”

“Why?”

“For a moment he thought you had betrayed him.”

“Damn it, Kisuke. I didn’t tell you to scare the kid.”

“It wasn’t on purpose.” Kisuke replies and he’s sure there’s a smile on both of them.

 

 

* * *

 

“What do you have in mind?”

Maybe it was because he still didn’t have sight, but he thought he was more adept at finding differences in tones, and he noticed how Yoruichi seemed to both apologize and recriminate him with her words.

“Oh, the usual, you know. Set things straight. In a couple more days, I’ll have everything ready and I’ll fix my eyesight and I will continue doing my job.”

“…I punished her.” Yoruichi blurts out, and it’s obvious who she’s talking about. Kisuke is honestly surprised.

“You didn’t kill her did you?”

“Nah, maybe I ought to but, I have a weak spot for her.”

“If we want this to work, you need to keep her by your side. Make her see. If not, then I can’t say I’ll be sorry to see her go.”

“You’re lucky I love you.”

Kisuke is silent.

He can almost feel Yoruichi smirk. “Oh? I see cat’s got your tongue.” She caressed his hair, briefly. “But I don’t lie, Kisuke.”

….

He still has things to learn about Yoruichi.

 

 

* * *

 

The first one that would have to go, if things were to unfurl properly was, of course, Aizen. The man was too close to Kisuke, and too cunning to boot. He relished in the war as much as in his experiments so Kisuke knew that he would not change sides.

Not to mention his track records of “accidents”, torture and disappearances that followed the man like a bad stench.

He’d love to frame him and have him killed but…

Time was of essence, and the faster they got rid of him, the less complications there would be, in theory.

Having the rebels kill him was probably his best shot, that way Kisuke could figure out a way to make him lower his defenses.

It was a good thing that not all of the Arrancars seemed to worship the ground he stood on.

 

* * *

 

“So let me get this straight, these Arrancar are sentient?”

“Yes. They shouldn’t be as different as what you guys call Vizards. “

“Alright. I can work with that. If they can stand us, they should be able to stand an Arrancar.“ Ichigo said confidently. Kisuke had stopped trying to figure out if Ichigo knew what he was even talking about.

He just nodded mildly, deferring to his opinion. “Yes, some are stupidly loyal to Aizen but others can think for themselves. I think that there’s one that would actually be useful as another spy. He also happens to be the strongest.”

Ichigo’s smile is savage. “I can _definitively_ work with that.”

“Right, go jack-off somewhere else, I have to get going.” Kisuke jabs, face still void of any particular emotion. He was surprised when the warrior’s face tinged pink.

“You absolute bastard.” He mutters under his breath, before he’s clearing his throat. He stares at him, not quite a glare, but almost. “Alright then, just one question.”

“Yes?”

“Do they hurt?”

Kisuke can’t help the surprise that springs to his face. Had he missed something? “Do what hurt?”

Ichigo has the gall to roll his eyes. “Well I don’t know, the stitches on your face?”

He involuntarily raises a hand to touch the crude stitches Benihime had left after restructuring and repairing his damaged eye sockets. He barely feels them, somehow too numb.“Oh, yeah. Not really. They just itch.”

“Soon.” He promises. “Soon we will get that healed.”

“Right.” Kisuke smiles blandly.

 

* * *

 

“You’re up.”

Kisuke didn’t even flinch. “And you are a frightening stalker. Do you want to share any other obvious statement?”

Ichigo appears from the shadows by his side as if he’d always been there. “I’m not a stalker.”

“Still in denial, I see. Well, what brings you here? Any news?”

“I am certainly not in denial. I just wanted to see if you were okay.”

Kisuke actually slants his body to face him as he arches an eyebrow. “Where is this sudden concern coming from?”

Ichigo rolls his eyes, clearly unimpressed. “It’s just that I‘ve noticed that lately you tend to get up in the middle of the night just to stare at the darkness until the cat lady comes to get you.”

Kisuke actually has to spend some time to digest those words. His hands feel cold as he closes them, but his voice is steady and light. “Are you perhaps confessing to your stalker tendencies?”

“Please indulge me.”

Kisuke very seriously considers not telling him. But it really did not affect him negatively and it somehow seemed important for the other man. “It’s nothing. I’ve just got some thinking to do.” He says, falling silent for a moment before asking. “How’d you know I was up anyway?”

“There’s a lot on my mind as well.” Ichigo says simply enough. But Kisuke isn’t second-in-command for nothing and he notices the way the muscle of his jaw jumps, a phantom of pain in his slouch. Physical or emotional he can’t tell.

Kisuke looks away from his not-enemy to stare into the blackness of the night. “Aren’t we two fucked up?”

“Quite.”

They don’t really say anything of importance, they just stand there, side by side, watching the dark of the night. It’s sort of companiable.

When Yoruichi pops up to get him at the crack of dawn, Kisuke feels better for some reason.

 

* * *

 

Next time he sees Soi Fon, he thought he’d be angry at her but he’s just shocked and horrified.

She’s missing an arm.

Maybe…

Maybe once upon a time, he wouldn’t have cared. She was Yoruichi’s, it was their problem and he wouldn’t butt in it. But.

If he was going to side with Ichigo. If he was going to risk his neck to change a society….

He couldn’t just let this slide.

He invites his boss out for drinks. She’s suspicious but she agrees. Before he has any chance to begin an elaborate conversation which would naturally flow back to Soi Fon’s predicament, Yoruichi grabs her sake and stares him dead in the eye.

“It’s not permanent and you know it.”

Kisuke swallows nervously. She had always had a knack for getting him off center. “It is still a pretty harsh punishment, Yoruichi-san.”

“She snitched on you. And _not_ to her direct superior, meaning me. She went to people that don’t need a reason to just mutilate valuable members of the Gotei 13.”

Kisuke can’t help but smile. She scowls at him and he returns to his serene semblance. “Yes, I don’t think… I’m not trying to justify her or anything. I just… she worships the floor you walk on; she was probably just worried about you. It doesn’t mean I forgive her, it’s just that I understand her actions. And I understand that having that same person mutilating you must be terrifying.”

“ _Kisuke_.” Yoruichi hisses back, posture tense and ready to attack.

“I’m not sorry she’s injured. I’m sadistically satisfied. But…” Here Kisuke decides to risk his neck again, because if Yoruichi didn’t change, _when_ Ichigo overthrew the Gotei 13, she would die too. “I think we have to change. “

Her eyes are inscrutable. They are the eyes of the Onmitsukidou commander, not of his friend. He looks down to his lap. For a brief moment, Kisuke had to wonder. How had he changed so much to risk his own skin to save someone else in the hypothetical scenario of a change.

“You think he’s going to win.”

Kisuke tenses up, because more than being his friend, more than being the Onmitsukidou commander, she is honor bound to the Gotei, she is obliged to report back even the smallest hint of a rebellion.

The scars under his eyes twinge in pain.

He looks back up when the silence stretches unnaturally. She’s not looking at him. She’s staring at her hands in silence.

There is trouble in her expression.

And relief.

“You know.” She finally says, voice tired. “Maybe.”

 

She clamps up after that and proceeds to waste Kisuke’s money on a hell of a lot of sake.

He wondered why it was surprising to remember she still carried the death of the Shibas and of Tessai on her shoulders. She wasn’t Kisuke. She probably remembered every day.

She had cried so much, her tears had run out. That’s why she didn’t cry for Soi Fon.

Given the choice to repent, to make a better society, to make a place where Kuukaku wouldn’t have been executed for protecting her brothers, and her brothers wouldn’t have been murdered for speaking out…

She would take it.

 

* * *

 

“We’re almost there.” Ichigo says, and there is both tension and excitement in his voice. He turns to look at Kisuke. “It’s all thanks to you.”

The man with the scars under his eyes stares on blankly. He feels tired. “I’ve hardly done anything.”

Ichigo huffs a laugh. “For your personality, you’ve done far more than anyone would have expected.”

“Ah, that may be so. You are a frightening individual, Ichigo.”

“More than you?”

Kisuke thinks on it. “In a different way, probably. But yes.”

Ichigo stares at him. “When this is all over, let me buy you a drink.”

Kisuke pauses. He collects his thoughts, his mask and then smiles at him. “So self-assured we’ll all survive your insane rebellion, are we?”

Ichigo doesn’t flinch. “It’s a promise.” He finally breaks away, cast darkening. “Don’t stand me up.”

Kisuke doesn’t have the heart to say no.

 

* * *

 

It was dangerous doing anything with Aizen sniffing around him but Kisuke wrote his testament.

He doesn’t have many possessions, and those he did own weren’t something anyone would want, so all he leaves are his words. His confessions.

He’s vague. He’s so so vague. But it’s not like he meant anyone to read it. He wrote it to give himself finality. Because-

He didn’t write anything particularly incriminatory, everything layered until the rebellion was barely hinted at. But then his letter goes missing.

He’s dead.

He’s so sure that he’s going to be dead in no time and to top it off he had probably betrayed Ichigo unknowingly. He freaks out, but there’s not much he can do. If it was Aizen who found it then there was nothing to be done. He’d just have to give Ichigo a word of warning and then wait to be killed by him or someone else.

He finds it hard to care much about his own demise.

Because…

“Because as time passes and society changes, I realize I will be nothing more than the bastard who murdered so many without remorse. I did it out of my free will. I will not fit in, if society changes. I will be looked at, as the old battle dog and maybe I’ll be glad to walk to my own execution.”

Kisuke spins around, stunned, stupefied and scared as he rounds on the tiny figure of Soi Fon, her prosthetic arm hanging limply and her other hand holding the letter she was reading. She doesn’t look up from it but doesn’t continue reading it.

Aizen would have been the worst, but Soi Fon wasn’t any better.

“Who have you told?” He begs.

“I thought you did everything out of personal gain. Anything to save your own hide.” She says, not answering him.

“ _Who else has read that letter?”_

Soi Fon is quiet for a moment. She lowers the letter, locking tired eyes with him. “Just me.”

“Who else have you told.”

“No one.”

“I don’t believe you.”

“You think I’m that much of a scum? After giving me a new opportunity?” She asks, cupping her fake arm.

“Then why.”

“I wanted to know what could have possibly driven _you_ to change. Urahara-taicho. I will follow Yoruichi-sama to my grave. You can’t be a suicide case if she’s to go wherever you are going.”

Kisuke stiffens. “Then that means?”

“Exactly what I said.” Soi Fon says. Depositing the damning letter on the closest desk between them. “Things are going to change, Urahara-taicho.”

 

* * *

 

“She’s on our side now.”

“She? I’m extremely charismatic, you’ll have to be more specific as to who we’re talking about.”

Kisuke almost rolls his eyes at the infuriating other. “I’m talking about Soi Fon.”

Ichigo’s face goes from lax to studiously inexpressive. “The one who had your eyes taken out?”

“The one I saved from your camp.”

“By killing her.”

“Just slowing her heartbeat.”

“Technicalities. Well, if you don’t hold a grudge, then who I am to say anything. Besides, I told you. She was already on the no-kill list since before.”

Kisuke is already smiling when he catches himself. He has a rebellion to think about, a betrayal to hide and several lives to protect (who was he, some sort of hero?) and still his mind has the gall to worry about… “Are you worried about me?”

The expression on Ichigo is comically stiff. “I’m worried about a lot of things, yeah.”

“You are angry at Soi Fon for injuring me. _Me_. If anything, I’m the only one of your little crew of recruits that deserved such a punishment.”

“Nobody has their hands clean in this war, Kisuke. Nobody is exempt from guilt. You don’t have to be so harsh on yourself.”

Kisuke shakes his head, in disbelief. “Ichigo… Ichigo, I’m afraid I don’t-“

“Kisuke.” Ichigo says and there’s a little undertone of distress in it. Kisuke hates it.

“I have a plan to take down Aizen.” Kisuke blurts out, for some reason worried about changing the topic.

Ichigo looks to be in pain for a moment before that is tucked away and The Rebel and War Icon surfaces.

“I’m all ears.”

 

* * *

 

It doesn’t go as smooth as Kisuke would have wanted.

Aizen doesn’t stay dead the first time Ichigo beheads him.

Long story short, he took a girl hostage, Kuchiki Rukia and everything went to shit from there.

Kisuke was there to witness Ichigo basically implode with rage when Kuchiki is used as a human shield. But when Ichigo dons a fully Hollow guise, Kuchiki literally freezes herself. She calls her zanpakuto’s name, calling her bankai and she freezes both herself and Aizen while he’s distracted.

That’s the turning point.

With both of Aizen’s hands temporarily unusable, Kisuke knows it’s his chance to activate the seals he had spread all around the labs. They are effective, and the unadulterated rage in his ex-coworker’s face is just the cherry on top.

The only remaining Arrancar who was little more than a pile of shredded meat whimpered softly before Ichigo beheaded his master for the last time. Kisuke put him out of his misery following that.

He turns in time to see both Ichigo and Kuchiki share an intimate moment, as Ichigo wiped the blood off her face and as she cradled his face with one frozen hand.

The sight makes him want to relax, but that would be impossible.

Aizen is dead, but it had gone so smoothly that they had been exposed. The Coup was starting now.

 

Ichigo barks order after order and a massive wave of people crawl their way into the protected Seireitei. Some of it was due to Kisuke weakening the infrastructure, of replacing the best guards. Some more is due to other spies he hasn’t met yet. But the most part is the brute strength Ichigo’s allies wield. It was a truly terrifying sight.

Kisuke doesn’t know half of the people he’s now sided with, but they seem to know him. Or he’s just inordinately lucky as none of their blows hit him.

He doesn’t give that much thought as he focuses on his task. Ichigo was the one who would confront Yamamoto Genryuusai once Rukia finished handling two other captains so she could _test_ Kisuke’s kidou seal to channel her power into herself, Ichigo and the arrancar Starrk, so they wouldn’t burn the moment Yamamoto unleashed his zanpakuto.

Kisuke was a renowned genius, but he was honestly worried that his seals would not stand against the inferno that was Ryuujin Jakka. He surmised they’d be fine as long as they defeated Yamamoto before he had any time to unleash his bankai.

Kisuke is also an assassin, he was only on the front rows whenever he was punished. He survived because he was just that good, but that just wasn’t his style. He decided to do what he knew best. He snuck into Kurotsuchi’s barracks and released poisonous gases he had stored away a long while ago. Kurotsuchi hand-picked the men at his squad so he was not at all guilty when they began to collapse, unaware of the toxin floating in the air. He snuck away before Kurotsuchi himself appeared and then he looked for someone who still wasn’t aware of the Coup.

He poisons a couple more people he comes across, and then heads out to look for Yoruichi. She’s battling the First division’s leader and for a moment he can’t help but marvel at her glorious speed.

He’s brought back as grunts from the Eleventh come crashing in, their elated grins of bloodlust absolutely disturbing and Kisuke makes quick work of them.

 

 Everyone stops their fights, however, when the air itself began to heat up, going beyond warm into boiling hot.

Everybody was in tension, wondering what would happen.

The Gotei is grinning savagely, clearly expecting a single outcome.

Kisuke has his heart in his throat and he actually prays to the Soul King to _please, please let him live._

And then the heat lets up.

 

There’s pandemonium.

 

Confusion, disarray, Kisuke dashes out, going to the epicenter of everything, wanting to see for himself-

To be honest, despite everything he half expects to see Ichigo’s charred corpse on the ground.

He doesn’t see that.

What he sees is a profusely Ichigo bleeding, one arm charred and completely useless, other equally severe burns covering his body and half of a hollow mask clinging to his face, hiding his eyes as he gasps for breath, while Yamamoto’s massive body laid on the ground at his feet, sword clearly impaling his heart.

For one stupid moment, Kisuke thinks. It’s over.

Then Ichigo collapses, splattering blood everywhere and Kisuke rushes to his side, calling Benihime’s full name and he mends him good enough for a real healer to come see him.

 

He doesn’t know her. But Inoue Orihime is not a name for a Shinigami. He lets her near and is witness to the miraculous work of veritable magic.

He’s still unconscious, so Kisuke heaves the man on his shoulder, slinging The War Icon around like a sack of potatoes as they flee.

 

Nowhere is safe, but he leads somewhere less bloody and he stays with the pair as he begins to think what he can do.

Yoruichi comes looking for him not a moment later and she hollers at him. “IT’S OVER!”

She’s tired, exhausted and hurt. But she’s elated.

Kisuke has to wonder what exactly had gone down because surely it hadn’t been more than ten minutes since all hell had broken loose.

But then Ichigo stirs and relief bubbles up his stomach. Yoruichi notices. Orihime notices. And Ichigo just smiles back.

“Dying is not yet in my plans, Kisuke. Don’t look so surprised. Besides. I told you I’d buy you a drink when this was over. I’m not allowed to stand you up either.”

“I risked my life too, I think I deserve it too, dear rebel.” Yoruichi butts in, unrepentantly and unapologetically. Ichigo looks a little uncertain for a moment, but then smiles. “Sure thing, catwoman.”

“Alright, let’s keep this talk about celebration for later. We still have damage control to go over, and hostages to convince or kill and last stragglers to get rid of.” Kisuke says, even as his body protests and he’s so weak and all he wants is a cup of something stronger than sake and to sleep until the next century.

“Shinji can manage that. If he’s not too injured.” Ichigo inputs quick enough.

“Despite my burning desire to trust someone I’ve never seen in my life; I have stuff to deal with.” Kisuke replies blandly and prepared to leave.

“Wait!” Now it’s the odd girl Inoue who stops him. She looks from him to Yoruichi, without any sort of judgment. “Wouldn’t you two like to get healed before going back?”

“Well, it can’t hurt.” Kisuke says, half-jokingly. Ichigo snorts.

 

It doesn’t hurt.

Au de contraire, it feels as magical as it looks. Kisuke just stares flummoxed as his skin mended back together. “You ‘reject’ the damage, you say?”

“Yes, people have described it as turning back time to a point where your flesh was undamaged.” Inoue replied distractedly, as she focused on healing Yoruichi’s shattered leg. None of their heavy wounds seem to even daunt her, either by complexity or gravity.

“Magic,” Kisuke mumbles gleefully, too high on pain and exhaustion to properly behave.

Before anything is properly planned, however, Ichigo makes them all wait as he _rips the fabric of dimensions open_ and briefly traversed through it, returning with a Rukia with only half a face remaining (the wound frozen as to not let it bleed freely) and a battered Starrk.

Upon passing through, the first thing the short Shinigami does is level her only working eye to glare at Ichigo. “How dare you make Starrk take me away? Do you not know-“ Her diatribe is cut short as she staggered on her feet. Before she even began to fall, the War Icon is already reaching for her, cradling her in his arms and Orihime hurried forward, materializing her magical healing shield.

“I will listen to all of it after you’re healed, you obnoxious bother.” Ichigo mutters darkly even as he intently stares at her reconstructing face. When bone, muscle and tissue were again connected he heaves a shaky breath of relief.

“I told you. I went with you to fight, not to be protected. I didn’t come to get in your way.” Rukia’s face lost its anger, letting her worry through. “I told you and nii-sama. If I died today in combat, it would be my choice, my sacrifice for the cause.”

Inoue finishes her healing and without a word shifts over to the silent Starrk who closes his eyes in relief at feeling the healing wash through his body. Kisuke is not as interested in that this time as he wonders how could the War Icon’s face show such a vulnerable expression as he stared back at the tired woman in his arms.

“All within reason, Shrimp.” Ichigo whispers and Kisuke is tempted to look away at the intimate encounter. “I also promised that I would never let you or Byakuya die. I’ve lost everything once already. I’m not willing to go through that again.”

“Don’t you think we feel the same as well?” Rukia murmurs, throwing herself at him in a bone-breaking hug.

Kisuke actually looks away this time, and misses the flicker of pain on Ichigo’s face. Rukia notices, as well as the flaky way he’s breathing but doesn’t mention it. It makes her blind with rage, but there was nothing anyone could do about that.

“Right. So, do you need me for anything else or can I leave?” Starrk interrupted the silence, voice lazy and dragging the syllables. The man stares back at him warily. Kisuke was suddenly and frighteningly reminded that this… creature had been an experiment of theirs.

Inoue doesn’t miss the glance and she comments in a polite voice. “I’m sure that you can leave now, Starrk-san. The Shinigami ought to pick up after themselves.”

Not a shinigami, but what _was_ this girl?

“I can take my brothers with me?” Starrk asks, polite and demure despite towering over the healer.

Inoue smiles at him. “Of course you can! How many remained in this plane? Oh! I can come with you, if they’re injured! The Shinigami can certainly wait!”

“Careful, Inoue. You’re starting to sound like Ishida.” Ichigo finally input into the conversation making Kisuke flounder, completely out of place and not knowing how to disappear.

The girl’s expression fills with glum for a moment. Then, still looking sad she smiles. “Well… someone has to carry his legacy, don’t you think?” There’s longing tearing at her face and Ichigo’s face softens.

“I’m sure you’ll do him justice.”

 

And they both disappear. There is silence for a moment before Yoruichi speaks up for the first time.

“Who would have thought we were fighting such pure innocent souls.” She comments, and there is a tired undertone in her voice that almost makes Kisuke get whiplash with how fast he turned to look at her. The two remaining rebels look at her as well.

“It didn’t have to go as long as it did. Even with everything you took, we were satisfied reaching a truce.” The Rukia woman bites back, eyes unkind. “And yet you all refused to listen.”

“We did.” Yoruichi bowed her head, accepting the blame. She looks back at them, something odd in her face. “I will not apologize for my actions, as I was simply carrying out my job to the best of my abilities. But…” And for the first time since Kisuke has known her, the Empress bows. “But I apologize to you for not trying to see beyond my job. And…” Her fists clench. “As a Shihoin, I apologize. I apologize for being unable to help the Kuchiki or the Shiba clan. As a person, I beg for your forgiveness for being unable to stop senseless deaths.”

If the Soul King himself had descended from his palace and invited Kisuke for tea, he’d be less surprised. He holds his breath, as the implications of everything Yoruichi has revealed begin to settle in, as well as being absolutely astounded by seeing Yoruichi so … so apologetic.

The other two don’t seem to find it as world-breaking. They are indeed surprised but not as much as Kisuke is pretending he’s not.

Rukia. _Kuchiki_ Rukia, Kisuke realizes, is the first to say, with steel in her eyes. “I heard, and accept the words of the Shihoin clan. But the Kuchiki clan is no more, you made sure it would fall. Words will not bring back my sister, or my family. Nor is it enough to atone for your sins. As one of the two survivors of our clan, I condemn you. I condemn you, Shihoin Yoruichi to _change_. Live through this revolution and ensure that there will never be a reason for another such war to break out. I condemn you to repent by living the remainder of your life in such a way Kaien and Hisana would be proud of you.”

She’s harsh. She tears through Yoruichi’s every weakness, every doubt but her punishment makes Yoruichi look back up, silent tears streaming down her face. She doesn’t really understand she has been forgiven.

Kisuke can’t help but wonder if he’d ever really known this woman. He’d never thought that she carried so much guilt, so much pain. It makes him feel oddly isolated.

“Of course, Kuchiki-dono.” She mutters at last, once she can find the words. “I will.”

“And,” and Kuchiki looks close to tears herself, but now her face and tone are softer, forgiving. “You’ll have to apologize to Byakuya-nii-sama.”

“Yes.”

Ichigo remains stoically silent and Kisuke hates himself a little for it but he can’t help the thought that Kuchiki had only spoken in behalf of her own clan. Was this man really a Shiba? Ichigo looks at him when he senses him staring and immediately looks away. He actually frowns when Yoruichi also looks at him and squeezes Rukia in a way that probably hurt. “Well, what more do you want? You heard her, that’s your way for atoning. Just… go with it.”

 

Yoruichi is done bowing. She wipes her face clean and stands at attention. “I swear I will.”

 

She prepares to leave then remembers that Kisuke was here too. She stops, not able to meet his eyes even as she walks towards him. She stops again, a couple feet away. “Will you come?” Is all she says, as she asks Kisuke to once more follow her to hell and back, through whatever adversity, through whatever might come.

There really is only one way to answer that and Kisuke is not against answering, “Of course.” Even if it pains him, because his friend had always been able to adapt, to socialize. Kisuke would only be a hindrance. “As long as I’m useful.”

Yoruichi shakes her head. “No. Not as a follower. Not as my second in command. As my friend.”

Kisuke doesn’t have the words. Instead he just takes her hand in his and polite-smiles. “Let’s start by cleaning up this mess of ours.”

The grin he receives is at equal parts savage and elated.

 

 

 

* * *

 

Kisuke tells Yoruichi all his ideas and lets her handle all the military aspects of it, disappearing to begin damage control as soon as possible as he urges the two rebels to call Inoue back, to both heal the worst of the rebels’ injuries as well as to use her as leverage to make desperate people finally give up either to receive medical help themselves, or to despair at their invincible enemies.

“I’ll call them back, hang on.” Ichigo says and once more tears through the fabric of dimensions to traverse through a black wasteland and that’s all Kisuke can see before the hole closes up behind him.

He can already feel a migraine incoming thanks to his burning curiosity and his irritation of everything related to Kurosaki Ichigo.

Rukia eyes him once he’s gone and Kisuke’s spine stiffens. He didn’t really get chastised, he didn’t get sentenced because he had yet to apologize. After all, he had helped in the massacres. He was the Onmitsukidou’s vice-commander and never had that title been more humiliating.

“I suppose.” He starts, never having been one for long or eloquent or remotely sensible speeches. “I must apologize as well.”

“What for?” Rukia asks, and it’s not innocent or naïve. She’s daring him to say it himself.

“For not caring.” Kisuke says, knowing that this was nothing but the truth, but also this would not get him the same forgiveness as Yoruichi.

Rukia nods. Curt, succinct, tired. “Do you care now?”

Kisuke looks back at her, meeting her eyes maybe for the first time. He’s abruptly taken back to a time where he stared into similar eyes, tarnishing with the red of blood. “Yes,” he whispers, and his voice breaks and he hasn’t wanted to die more urgently that right at this moment.

“I… wish you would have cared before.” Rukia starts. “I wish. I wish the both of you had stopped to think for a second.” She sighs, and she looks far more tired than at any other moment. “But that is just futile wishing. What is done is done. I accept your apology, but I cannot forgive you either. You too will have to atone.”

Kisuke smiles at her. “I will. I will vow myself to you two. Whatever job, whatever thing you decide to do to me, I will accept.”

Rukia shakes her head. “My grudge was with Shihoin. Ichigo can decide for a suitable punishment, if you can’t come up with one yourself.”

“Why?”

Rukia stares at the remains of a man standing in front of her. “There’s only so much hate I can hold. For you I only hold disappointment.”

Kisuke looks down.

“But.” Rukia whispers, “you spared Renji. Even if it might have gotten you killed. You spared my best friend.”

“It was mere chance.”

“It was change.” Rukia shoots back and Kisuke doesn’t have the opportunity to ask her to clarify.

It is then that Ichigo returns, carrying in his arms the wonder healer, seemingly arguing with her, “-er said that you were _fat_ , I just said you’re heavier than what you look, c’mon don’t get angry.”

The offended girl refuses to answer and just jumps to her feet, arms crossed.

“Alright, alright, _I’m sorry_ , okay?” Ichigo says all-sufferingly, rolling his eyes at the inevitable twitch of Inoue’s lips.

“You are forgiven.” She declares, letting the smile slip free. “Okay then. You explained some things on our way here, but what are we exactly going to do?”

“Kisuke?” For some god-forsaken reason, the man decides to look at him, deferring to his judgement. It startles him, but he understands his own value better than most.

“Alright, give me a moment to think.” He says, scratching irritably at his stitches under his eyes. “So, Inoue-san-“

“Inoue,” Ichigo butts in, throwing Kisuke off, he points his chin at the man. “Heal his eyes first. He’ll get distracted otherwise.”

The healer gives Kisuke an odd look, glancing back at Ichigo briefly before her shield of healing formed at her side and then reappeared on his face.

Kisuke can feel the pain finally leave him, but he’s still mildly concerned about that look. Had Ichigo talked about him?

Well, obviously. She was the healer, Ichigo would have wanted to know if it was possible to heal him. Actually, “Can you heal anything?” He asks the girl.

She’s thoughtful for a moment, “with the obvious exception of death, I still haven’t come across anything I can’t heal.”

“How many can you heal before you burn out?”

She considers this. “Only about three hundred. Another two if I can use their own reiatsu.”

“That is an alarmingly large number.”

Inoue smiles at him in a manner that states the obvious. In a war, it was never enough.

Kisuke hums, ideas swirling like crazy. “Okay, then here’s my plan.”

 

 

* * *

 

Surprisingly enough, the former Nobles are satisfied with his plan, they share a short private talk to decide how they would deal with people they had once cared for, and where they would rendezvous and then with fire burning in their eyes, they’re ready to go.

“I’ll stay to protect Inoue. You go turn the tides again, Ichigo.” Rukia says, laying a hand on the girl who smiles back at her. That’s all the cue Ichigo needs before he’s on his feet and already heading out. Kisuke is just a couple steps behind.

Before disappearing, eyes already a blazing gold over black, and his mask forming from his chin up, Ichigo calls out, “Don’t freeze!” Which must mean something more because it makes Rukia smile and call back,

“Don’t burn!”

 

 

* * *

Cleaning up turns out to be almost as messy as the war. 

Kisuke has to curb several foul-hardy Shinigami and a lot of critically injured allies die because they couldn’t get medical attention fast enough.

The War is over. But the skirmishes of idiots in denial continue.

Kisuke joins Yoruichi and together they easily decimate the Onmitsukidou, either turning them to their sides, or killing them.

It’s not the first time they have killed. It’s not the first time they have betrayed trust. But it still hurts, just like the first time.

(Would it ever stop? When had it began? When had it stopped?)

Yoruichi leads misfit armies against the remains of the Gotei, forcing them to either surrender or face the consequences.

Kisuke continues threatening people with lack of medical aid, creating a rippling whisper of the change that was happening. Of the promises of a brighter future. He probably wouldn’t have had quite as fast an effect if Hitsugaya hadn’t stopped to have a talk with him, before deciding all on his own to help him.

But even so, there are a few stragglers and Kisuke throws himself on the battlefield without anyone’s orders, whenever he sees it as necessary.

Often times, in the reprieves he would spot Ichigo, and the man would only smile at him, before continuing the assault, his hollow powers unleashing chaos and destruction.

He noticed that among all the Vizards –who were easily distinguished for the absurd hollow masks they bore– only Ichigo and who he supposed was Shinji had their powers on at all times. The others had similarly frightening power, but most of the times they fought without their masks.

He doesn’t give it much thought at the moment, but at one point, when things seem to have calmed down at last he has the time to. Kyouraku finally seemed to be willing to negotiate, and it’s not Ichigo who takes the truce offer, but rather the Kuchiki siblings and Shinji are the ones who enter the make-shift tent.

Kisuke is restless, not actually daring to hope that things were actually done. He sees Ichigo walking up to him, frame as tense as always and obviously jittery but smiling at him.

Kisuke squints at him so suddenly that Ichigo actually falters in his step. “Your eyes are still golden.” He says as way of greeting, making the half-smile on Ichigo’s face slide off like water.

 “What do you mean?” The Vizard says, defensively. It was odd and suspicious the way he had closed off so suddenly. So evidently.

“Your eyes are brown, Ichigo.”

Ichigo stares, knowing that Kisuke was onto him. “I know.” He looks away. “It’s nothing.”

Kisuke cocks his head. Wondering how much he could push. “You usually completely deactivate your Hollow powers. If you can call it that, to be honest I’m not familiar enough with that power of yours to make a proper assessment.”

Ichigo looks somewhat concerned. “At what moment could you have possibly deduced that?”

Kisuke blinks innocently. “My, you’ve given me plenty of such opportunities.” Also, there were the failed Hollowification experiments he had performed, but there’s no need to mention that. His face loses some of its cheer. “Ichigo. Is everything alright?”

He scowls at the ground, not meeting his gaze. “Yes. Perfect.”

Kisuke frowns.

He had never truly thought about it but…

What were the side effects of having such immense power?

What exactly had the Vizards sacrificed to control that power? To get on top of it? By the way Ichigo is shiftily eyeing him, Kisuke’s pretty sure he knows what his train of thought is and doesn’t like it.

“Then, is there something you wanted to tell me?” Kisuke smiles at him, tucking his thoughts and dreadful suspicions to the back of his mind. The War Hero frowns at him briefly, trying to gauge his sincerity before relaxing.

“Inoue wanted to consult you. So apparently someone poisoned the water at the infirmary. There was just one casualty, but we’d like to know if you have an idea of who this could be or where could we find him.” Ichigo says, back straight and professional. Eyes like golden coins glare at him.

Kisuke grimaces. “That’s the work of the Onmitsukidou.” He informs quickly enough, no longer focusing on Ichigo as his massive mind went over the thousands of profiles of the men under him. “I’d have to take a sample to be sure, but I’m guessing it’s odorless and colorless?”

“Yeah. You know who’s it from?”

Kisuke snorts. “That’s the trademark of our division, Ichigo. It just rules out a couple of idiots that like to have ‘personality’.” He pulls back from his vice-commander position; he looks up into golden eyes. “I’ll have to run tests, that sort of poison was only available to our upper echelon, and there’s a chance that…” He trails off, mind whirling furiously. “No, if they’re doing this _after_ the war is through, then they are just hot-headed assholes. It has to be them.”

“Meaning…?”

Kisuke’s eyes light up with unholy delight. “I have some disciples to punish.”

Ichigo eyes him, face unreadable. Then he just shrugged. “I’ll leave it to you.”

“How gracious of you.” Kisuke says. Ichigo grins briefly before turning to leave.

“Well, then now I got to make sure that-“

“Ichigo.” Kisuke stops him, the other young man stiffens immediately. “Take a breather.”

His shoulders stiffen. He shrugs him off. “Don’t tell me what to do.”

Kisuke’s mouth forms a thin line. There was so much to be gleaned from that curt and aggressive response... Kisuke’s not exactly pleased.  Ichigo stops and shoots him a curiously soft look.

“Don’t forget we still haven’t gone drinking. I said it’s on me. Don’t stand me up.” Ichigo mutters before disappearing and Kisuke would be lying if it didn’t make him feel inexplicably better.

 

* * *

Several months since Kisuke saved Ichigo that fateful day, the Gotei 13 has finally been overthrown.

Kisuke feels lighter than he has ever felt.

He’s pretty sure he cried at some point but he can’t recall.

He allows himself to see the start, the beginnings of a better life and…

He prepares to leave. Permanently.

The day after the treaty is signed, and the war is officially declared over, Kisuke heads back to his sleeping quarters one last time. For some reason, Ichigo is waiting for him there.

“At this point it’s not even a surprise anymore. A pleasure to see you.” Kisuke says as greeting, bobbing his head but not really reacting. “Is there something wrong?”

“Kisuke.” He stops, begins again. “We still have that promise to go out for drinks. Are you going to stand me up?”

Kisuke had completely forgotten.

“Kisuke, are you-?”

“What are you going to do now that the war is over?” Kisuke interrupts him lightly, “Because I really recommend a hobby. This whole stalking thing is getting kind of boring.”

Ichigo lowers his shoulders an inch too low to be natural. “I still don’t know.”

“Huh,” Kisuke says, not wanting to see him sad. “How about getting married?”

“What?” Ichigo squints suspiciously. “To whom?” He raises his guard. “Certainly you’re not proposing, are you?”

Kisuke blinks as all sign of surprise. “I meant to that girl, Kuchiki.”

Ichigo looks so confused for a moment, it’s comical. He then proceeds to shudder. “God no, she’s like my sister!”

“Oh.”

“I- grah, don’t change the topic!” Ichigo messed up his hair, exasperated and the most relaxed he had ever seen him. Although he was a little sidetracked from his assessment.

Kisuke feels rightfully confused. “What topic?”

“The whole y’know…” Ichigo sighs, starts over. “I spoke to Soi Fon.”

“Really? Whatever for?” He falls silent as he remembers what Ichigo thought about her and he frowns dubiously. “You didn’t kill her, did you?”

“No!” Ichigo replies immediately, sounding scandalized. He straightens himself and goes back to his overly somber look. “She… might have implied you don’t feel like you fit in.”

Kisuke schools his face into a neutral nothing. “She’s terribly mouthy, that girl. Well. I don’t see how this is any of your concern.”

“Kisuke…”

“ _Okay_ , what is it you want?”

Ichigo doesn’t pay attention to his increasing bad mood. If anything Ichigo looks as dejected as before. It rubbed him the wrong way. “I don’t want you to feel like an outsider.”

“You have just abolished my entire existence, Ichigo. Please do give me some time to adjust.”

“Only if you promise me something.”

Kisuke frowns. “What?”

“You’ll stay.”

Somehow, the words hit him hard and it takes a lot of self-control not to disappear on the spot or begin attacking him. Not like either would have worked anyway.

Still, his voice is soft and velvety like the sweetest poison when he answers. “I will kindly decline. I did not go through all that to become someone else’s dog.”

“No, Kisuke.” Ichigo has the audacity to grab his arm. He’s not looking at him, which is odd. His unwavering certainty is not there. He actually looks small and young for once. “Please stay alive, is what I’m asking you.”

“Why?” Kisuke asks him, begs him. If Ichigo didn’t mean to own him, then he didn’t understand why he would care. “Why do you want to?”

“I don’t want to lose you too.” Ichigo whispers, raw pain in his every word. It scares Kisuke like no blade has ever done. He doesn’t understand him, he doesn’t seem to be able to understand.

“You don’t even know me. You don’t know the things I’ve done.”

“Neither do you know what I’ve done-“

Kisuke actually laughs at that. “I’m sure it doesn’t even come _close_.”

Ichigo still doesn’t desist. His voice is deep and unwavering, but he’s still not meeting his gaze. “Lives can turn around. I’m trying to. Why not join me?”

Kisuke sighs, releases himself so he can grab his chin and force him to meet his eyes. “Ichigo. I do not deserve redemption. I do not deserve to stand by your side. Please desist.”

Ichigo doesn’t stop staring at him.

“Who says what you deserve and what not?”

“I think it’s a pretty obvious thing.”

“Kisuke. I’ve never… never thought about my future. I was never sure if I would survive to see tomorrow. So I never thought about it. And for the first time I found myself looking forward to talking to someone, to deciphering who he is, to figure out where he stands. I began to look forward to ending the war so he can finally be free. Kisuke, I’m not right in the head either. I have a hollow lurking inside too, waiting for the moment to strike. I’ve seen the worst of many of my friends and still stuck with them. Because… I’m a selfish man. I’m no hero. If I save the world, then that’s fantastic, but really, I’m just doing it for my friends. For myself”

Kisuke stares at him. “You say so many negative things about yourself, but you fail to see how innocent you sound, how pure. You must be the person with the biggest heart that I know of. Which, frankly isn’t hard to achieve.” He shakes his head when Ichigo makes to reply. “I’m really happy for you, I’m happy that you have found a purpose in life, that you have finally seen a future you and your friends can live in. But that’s all you. I was just a happy mistake in your path, I had nothing to do with it, so you shouldn’t think like that.”

Ichigo looks down, for a second looking hurt like no sword or foe had ever managed to do. Then he slants a hard gaze on him. “You don’t get to play martyr in this, Kisuke. You do not get to call me a saint. There’s so much blood in my hands, that I was so sure I would never find anyone who would stand by my side. Or if I found someone, they’d leave soon after.”

“I’m sure you’re only exaggerating. Besides who wouldn’t want to be by your side?”

“You, apparently.”

Even though he should have expected, Kisuke still looks away sharply. “Ichigo…”

“If you’re so willing to tell me I can do better, why don’t you do that to yourself? The moment you looked away from your orders and began to question, you began to atone. You decided all by yourself to see the reason for this war, and when you found it illogical and wrong, you decided to change. You had many a reason to deny me, to report me, to harm me. But you did not. Why is it so hard for you to see that you are more than what you perceive?”

“Ichigo, you’re very kind but you have to understand. I’m old. I was raised in the Onmitsukidou, I’m too old for new tricks, no matter what I do, my past is something I can’t even begin to atone for…”

“So you’d rather have only lived as an assassin and nothing more? You won’t even try to see the new future you helped bring? The new hope for your friends?

“I don’t mind. I’m at peace with atoning with my death.”

“That is not atoning. That is running away.”

“Maybe.”

Ichigo bows his head. “That is leaving me behind.”

The words tear at his heart even as his mind tries to call them fake. His voice is weak and feeble when he says, “I shouldn’t have that much importance in your life.”

“Yeah. You shouldn’t.”

“I’m sorry.”

“You’re not. If you were you would not be willingly leaving me after… after losing so many people- don’t leave me too.”

Kisuke holds him, feeling himself caving at the soft tremors of the young soul. “I have blood on my hands.”

“I know.”

“I have taken countless innocent lives.”

“I know.”

“I am a coward.”

“You’re braver than what you give yourself credit for.”

“I’m tainted, Ichigo, and nothing I do will fix that.”

“You and I will have to carry our sins. But we have to live for that.”

“I’m not needed in that new society. I’m not welcome either.”

“They’ll learn. You’ll learn.” “I have to learn as well. No need for a war veteran once it’s over, right?”

“Ichigo, why me?”

“Because it’s you.” The simple sincerity blows him away. It leaves him speechless.

 The brave man with the earnest eyes stares at him, tall and imposing and not a hundred percent sure. He stares right through, not as the War Icon, not as the newest VIzard, but just as Kurosaki Ichigo. Firm, but not unkind. Stoic, but nervous.

He stares and he looks at Kisuke for what he is, and for what he could be. He looks and he accepts and he still offers him a smile. The smile is cocky and wide and nervous and hopeful.

“Let me buy you a drink. Don’t stand me up.”

Kisuke finally smiles back. He looks into decided brown eyes.

He’s not entirely sure he deserves it, but if Ichigo’s willing to give him a chance, then Kisuke can’t really say no.

“Even if it’s the last thing I do.”

 

END

 

 


	2. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Epilogue to a 15k epic.

For once it was Kisuke sidling up to Ichigo, joining him on the relatively calm pub, instead of being accosted by the War Hero himself. The thought had a small smile pulling at his lips as Kisuke greeted his aggravating companion.

“Hello there, dear stalker. This is surely a nice change of pace.” The blond man said, voice quiet and subdued despite his teasing face. The man at the secluded corner at the bar stared at him for a moment, expression open and happy before his lips stretched in a smirk.

“It just took you a war and a coup for you to gather the courage to come talk to me?” He says, tone mocking but Kisuke didn’t need all of his previous experience at the Onmitsukidou to pick up the real, joyous tilt of his lips or the crow’s feet on his eyes.

It was still frighteningly astonishing how much Ichigo’s open expression aimed at him made warmth rather than fear coil in his stomach.

He does know how to hide it all, however. Kisuke nods at him, taking up the seat by his side, making sure he had plenty of reflective surfaces to see whatever was behind him. Still it didn’t stop the way his skin crawled and prickled at knowing and feeling the people he was giving his back to.

(In the end he sat sideways, his back to the wall, facing Ichigo and their small crowd. Ichigo was not surprised, in fact, he had chosen this secluded spot, and left the last seat before the drink isle joined the wall for his companion.)

“Well, seeing as how you were the leader of the opposing force, are you really surprised?” Kisuke replies, voice mild and smile bland. Ichigo snorts and rolls his eyes with amusement and while Kisuke’s façade did not move, the War Hero could see his eyes brimming with amusement.

“In that case, I would like to say cheers, on ending the war. I finally made you talk to me.” Ichigo grins, cocky and so sure of himself.

Kisuke’s heart leaps in his chest.

Bantering was good and all but, he knew there were people other than Ichigo in this pub who knew how he looked like, who knew what he had done –judging by the subtle glares and the growing crowd.

Bantering was good and enjoyable, but Kisuke was afraid that the masses would misinterpret his words. Make them think he was telling the truth.

Making them associate Ichigo with the number one assassin.

“My, how bold of you,” Kisuke says, playing along, knowing what would be best to make things move as smoothly as possible. Besides, the sooner he had his drink, the sooner he could leave this suffocating environment. “Shall we drink, then?”

Ichigo is still smiling, open, warm. Incandescent. Like staring at the sun.

Kisuke has to wonder if he hadn’t been blinded by it at some point. 

Probably many times.

 

Ichigo orders two beers, despite the drink he already had in hand. The bartender doesn’t know who Kisuke is, seeing as how he just bowed and tripped over himself to serve the uncomfortable-looking Ichigo, barely giving Kisuke a cursory glance. But Kisuke is still hesitant over accepting a drink from a stranger.

Before he has time to think up a way to test for poison without looking rude, Ichigo reaches for his mug gives two long gulps before setting it down and pushing it in his direction without faltering.

Kisuke’s hand spasms closed over the cold handle, the amber liquid in its interior slushing but not overflowing. He’s a little too stunned for such a simple gesture, but.

Ichigo had no need to do it.

Kisuke doesn’t know a single soul who would personally taste-test a possible poisoned drink meant for him.

He had known ever since he finally succumbed to Ichigo’s weird insistence of finally going to get that drink, but it was still so surreal.

Ichigo grins at him, his crow’s feet still there but the remnants of a foam mustache make him appear as young as he probably is. Probably younger than Kisuke is, for starters.

So young and yet he had been the head of the rebellion. Ah, he really should stop calling it that.

It had been a revolution, with everything it entailed.

And he had been on the wrong side of it, with all of what it meant. Kisuke thought, as the whispers continued.

 

“Aren’t you going to drink?” Ichigo is asking him, either still not hearing them, or not caring what they were saying. Knowing him, both might be possible. He has wiped the foam over his lip, but he doesn’t seem to care much as he drinks from his own mug, earning himself another mustache.

It’s frankly endearing.

“I must say I’m concerned, Ichigo. Are you old enough to be drinking?” He says, hopefully he could keep him focused enough to miss the rising whispers. These people had no subtlety at all.

Ichigo…

Ichigo splutters and begins choking on his drink, his ears tinging red. Kisuke is torn between amused and surprised and his chest hurts with a weird bubble of something that will certainly escape him if he opens his mouth.

“ _Ichigo-sama!”_ A shrill voice interrupts them so suddenly, Kisuke jumps back on his feet, a short knife in hand.

The gaudy looking female that had interrupted them so rudely, ignores him as she fawns over Ichigo. “Are you alright, Ichigo-sama? Did that bastard do something to you? I’m here with my friends would you like to join us instead?” She said in a quick uninterrupted barrage of words, unmindful of the awkward face or stiff posture of Ichigo.

“Oi, Kisuke, calm down it’s…” Ichigo decides to ignore the woman trying to cling to him, choosing instead to calm down his skittish drinking buddy, but his focus has broken and the whispers continue to surge, louder and wilder as the crowds grow braver with this woman’s meddling.

Kisuke knows that his best bet is to sheathe his sword and look as unthreatening as possible, which he does, amongst whispers of, “ _coward,” “murderer,” “heartless.”_

Ichigo finally hears the words, the taunts, the accusations and immediately looks enraged and ready to wage yet another war, despite the woman clinging to him, but Kisuke is quick to step up, drawing his attention. and stopping him from making any stupid moves– like defend his honor.

“Well then, Ichigo. I’m afraid I should leave before anything else happens.” Kisuke says mildly, as if not hearing the curses, the threats. “Do not worry, I shall consider our promise fulfilled, thank you for…” Not inviting him, that would create more problems for him. “For giving me a show of your clemency. It has been noted.”

Gold shines in his eyes as Ichigo lunges for him in a last ditch attempt to make him stay, but his hands close on thin air as the woman at his side is dislodged and clatters to the ground, clothes askew.

“Fuck it.” Ichigo mutters darkly as his fist tightens.

 

* * *

 

Kisuke wasn’t sure what he was expecting but he sure as hell hadn’t been expecting to see Kurosaki Ichigo in the flesh banging on his door the following morning.

Kisuke doesn’t feel like seeing him, but he’d rather face whatever this was, than have to replace the shattered front door of his temporal lodgings.

 

By the way the hinges creaked ominously as he opened the door, he very much feared he’d have to do it anyway.

He’s not too sure what to make of the scowl Ichigo aims at him the instant he opens the door, fist still raised high to continue breaking down the door, but he doesn’t know what else to ask other than, “pray tell. How did you know I was here?”

Ichigo opens his mouth. Closes it.

Kisuke would have found it amusing if not for the suspicion that… “did you follow me here?” Had he been distracted enough not to sense he was being followed?

“I-no!” Ichigo rebuffs immediately, looking concerned and embarrassed. “No, I just… maybe."

Was Kisuke losing his touch?

Was this individual really getting under his skin, under his defenses without Kisuke having a say on it?

“Alright then, dear Stalker, what are you doing here?” Kisuke asks with a sigh, choosing to ponder on what that meant when he no longer had this man hovering over him. He actually took a step back as a big bottle of sake is shoved his way.

He looks from the bottle to the man holding it, with his default smile tinged with confusion. “Ichigo? What is this?”

“I am here,” Ichigo began categorically. “To fulfill my promise to you.”

Kisuke feels justified in asking, “what promise?”

He’s pretty sure the War Icon doesn’t punch him only because both of his hands were busy. Still, Kisuke’s eyes are drawn to Ichigo’s hand as his knuckles crack ominously.

He looks back at his face and he’s surprised at seeing the hooded look in his face. The way his jaw is tense and his brow furrowed. He gulps, making his adam’s apple bob, before he can say, “I told you. I told you drink’s on me.”

“But what are you talking about?” Kisuke demands to know, reeling back and giving another step back. Was this man lunatic? “I already-“

“Last time… doesn’t count.” Ichigo whispers, voice soft and affected. At odds with what his body language had been hinting at. He locks brown eyes with his. “I… they… “ He bites his lip, begins again. “You didn’t even drink so it doesn’t count.”

Kisuke freezes, unwilling to acknowledge the emotions he can pick up. Unable to understand why it weighed on his chest so much. “Ichigo, I really don’t…”

“ _Please_.”

 

Kisuke bows his head and steps away, letting Ichigo in. The young veteran closes the door behind him and tries to meet his lowered gaze. “Kisuke?” He finally asks, voice soft. “Am I being too forceful?”

An amused smile tugs at his lips. “Are you becoming self-aware now?”

Ichigo huffs. “Very funny.” He then looks at the bottle in his hands. He brings it up to the light as if to examine the container. “I’m sorry.” He mumbles.

“Whatever for?”

“I didn’t think many people knew of that place. Or even knew your face.” Ichigo begins. His voice loses the light tone as he scowls. “I didn’t mean to put you through that.”

“Put me through what exactly?”

“Did you also go deaf as well as blind?”

Kisuke tenses up and before Ichigo can apologize, he rolls his eyes. “I’m not the one being a dramaqueen.”

Ichigo scowls as reflex before he huffs with amusement, “oh sure, _I’m_ the dramatic one.”

Kisuke’s eyebrows disappear behind his fringe. “Are you really asking that?”

This effectively throws Ichigo off, making him squint at him as Kisuke does a good rendition of mild concern.

Kisuke feels something weird on his face and when he touches his lips he discovers the smile that had taken over him. Surprised, he looks up and at noticing the same surprise on the other man he immediately transforms it into a polite-smile as he bows from his waist down before performing a grand flourish inviting him in. “After you, dear Stalker.”

There’s a bit of hesitance which makes Kisuke look back up and Ichigo…. Ichigo is looking vulnerable again, hands outstretched in his direction but not actually touching him.

“Please don’t do that.” Ichigo whispers, and there’s a slant to his shoulder that clues him in that it’s not just a feeling of awkwardness or being uncomfortable. “I’m not… nobility or something like that. And besides, we’re friends, aren’t we?”

Ah.

Kisuke can feel the guilt, pain and hopelessness beginning to constrict his chest, to clog his throat as he smiled again at the Shiba survivor. “I’d consider this more a stalker-victim situation, but you know, I suppose everyone sees what they want to see.”

And just like that, the longing, the sadness disappears from his body as Ichigo rolls his eyes, inflating his cheeks slightly like a kid. “You’re never going to stop calling me that, are you?”

 

_“Kisuke?”_

_“Yes?”_

_“They weren’t wrong.”_

_“…Pardon?”_

_“The Shibas… they didn’t deserve this.”_

_“Yoruichi-dono? Are you injured? I do not understand, why are you crying? You completed your mission, everything was carried out to perfection…_

_“…Yoruichi-dono?”_

 

“Well, I think you have earned that title on your own right. It would be a shame not to.” Kisuke replies with yet another polite-smile that doesn’t quite do the trick because Ichigo frowns slightly and opens his mouth to say something, thinks better of it and then just continues on inside with just one last glance at him.

Kisuke takes that brief second to breathe in, letting his movements still, his shaking stop. He breathes out to dislodge the knot in his throat before he slinks his way to the kitchen where Ichigo is already waiting for him.

 

 

* * *

 

Ichigo opens the bottle without much finesse as Kisuke goes hunting for a couple cups. He doesn’t really live there, he doesn’t really live anywhere anymore, but Yoruichi still liked to be the bane of his existence and so the sake cups had accompanied him on all of his house jumping.

Ichigo is the one to pour for both of them despite Kisuke’s complaints. Ichigo insists that It’s okay, he doesn’t mind, he wants to do it, there’s nobody else watching anyway.

He never actually lets go of the bottle so it’s not like Kisuke had the opportunity of doing it himself. He has the impression that Ichigo means well, but his stomach churns uncomfortably, at how he’s been treated like he’s worth much more than he really is.

Kisuke sits back down, back ramrod stiff like the good soldier he is, as he waits. Ichigo grimaces at seeing that, but doesn’t comment on it, instead taking a little sip from one cup before sliding it over to Kisuke.

The blond man picks up the cup, swirling the clear liquid inside. “I was wondering, where did you get the alcohol?”

“Still suspicious? I bought it myself from a local brewery. I know you would have refused anything that was gifted to me.”

“Why do you work so hard to make this drinking party happen?”

Ichigo scowls and every line of his face betrays the hows and the whys he won the war. “It was a promise.” He simply says.

Kisuke feels dread curling in his stomach. Had he also been responsible for the promises broken, the hopes shattered, the crippling fear of not failing even the smallest promise –not again.

“Oi-“

Kisuke tilts back his head and lets the alcohol down his throat.

He feels a little weird at the hot sensation in his stomach. Half of him wants to jump and heave that warmth out of his body before it’s too late, but he stays put. Instead, still looking at his vase he mutters, “don’t worry. I’m not going to be another reason for breaking your promise.”

Ichigo doesn’t smile, doesn’t say anything. He just looks down sharply before pouring him again, hand shaky.

Kisuke downs it again.

It’s quiet.

It’s nice.

They don’t talk much after that but as the sun continued its path across the sky, Kisuke could see Ichigo smiling again.

Kisuke blames it on the alcohol.

 

Before they get too drunk, Ichigo stands up with an overly exaggerated sigh and prepares to leaves. Kisuke nods and accompanies him to the door again.

Kisuke half wants to offer him to stay, but for both of their sanities it’s best if he doesn’t.

 

Ichigo stands at his doorstep, one foot still inside, and locks eyes with him. In that soft, unusual tone, he promises. “Again. Let me buy you a drink.”

Kisuke actually visibly flinches, having been taken off guard. He tears his gaze away, preferring to stare at the ground. “Ichigo…Please stop it.”

Ichigo looks down as well and when the former Onmitsukidou glances briefly at him, he’s frowning. “Why?”

“You already fulfilled your promise. Don’t you have better things to do?”

“I don’t.”

Kisuke can muster enough energy to roll his eyes. “Right. _Really_ believable.”

“Kisuke.”

“What.”

Ichigo looks at him, opens his mouth. And flinches away as if somehow he had gotten hurt. “If I don’t bind you here. Would you stay?”

Kisuke stares. He stares and stares and tries to make sense of his words. Panicked and stricken all he manages to say is, “I promised you too, we would go out to drink. I suppose it’s my time to invite you.”

The hope on the War Hero’s eyes is so fragile, Kisuke isn’t sure he deserves to see it.

“Right,” the young veteran says. “It’s a promise.”

Live.

For me, with me.

Kisuke looks down, overwhelmed by everything Ichigo’s conveying.

“Even if I don’t deserve to?”

“Yes, even then.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaaand finally they get their drink! \o/ despite Kisuke freaking out all the time lol.
> 
> With that we conclude Winds of Change.  
> For now.  
> At first I was just going to share with you a couple extra scenes and backstory that couldn't be fitted into the main story, but I think it's more likely it'll be another oneshot sequel, so let me know if you're interested I guess.
> 
> It's about the Vizards, and the price Ichigo paid to become the War Icon.
> 
> When the war is over and Ichigo has won, fate will come back to get her due.
> 
>  
> 
> Ichigo gambled and gave everything away in exchange for power, and finally the price paid has to be claimed.
> 
> I hope you look forward to it!
> 
> Don't forget to drop a comment!

**Author's Note:**

> This story was asking me for a chapter two which I rotundly refused (I didn't have the time for another 16k+ thing honestly), which is why I wrote a couple extra scenes that'll be up tomorrow probably.


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